That’s right, another segment of Interviews with a Dead Playwright because the live ones can file restraining orders ! I know what you’re thinking: “He’s finally snapped” “His first interview was with the Bard himself, William Shakespeare (CLICK HERE TO READ) how can he possibly top that?”
Well, that’s a lot of pressure, I can’t, that’s not fair, there are a TON of brilliant dead playwrights out there who I can hallucinate talking to !
So today I sat down with one of the broodiest men who have ever taken to the bottle pen, Mister Samuel Beckett!
AG: Hi Sam
Sam: Don’t call me Sam
AG: Why, because it rhymes with ham?
AG: If you looked like that, this interview would be OVER. Because I’d eat you.
Ham: All right I’m going
AG: No, no, come back! We have a picture of you, too.
AG: Seriously?
Sam: I would love that picture of me, if I believed in love at all. A wise man named Me once said “Do we mean love, when we say love?”
AG: …you’re a really happy guy
Beckmeister: Nothing is funnier than unhappiness
AG: You are just quoting yourself, aren’t you
Beck: Every word is like an unnecessary stain on silence and nothingness.
AG: Well with an attitude like that, this interview is going to be madd difficult annoying short
Samby: If we prick them, do they not bleed?
AG: That wasn’t you, don’t even front like that, Samuel Beckett!
Samuel: All right, that wasn’t me.
AG: Now, Sam
Sam: ::grumblegrumble::
AG: -Uel, you’ve encountered your fair amount of regection in your life, haven’t you?
SamB: I suffered for my art
AG: Yeah, can you elaborate for all those readers who weren’t forced against their will to take theatre history and read Waiting for Godot 20 times?
sAm: Shouldn’t that sentence be a strike through?
AG: Nah.
saM: I wrote most of my plays in France during WWII, in which I pissed everybody off by talking against the Germans. I was in hiding, in exile, I was persecuted-
AG: Were you waiting for Godot?
SamuelMcCrankyPants: I WAS IN EXILE!
AG: So basically, you’ve had your fair share of rejection
Sam: Yes
AG: So do you have any words of advice for writers who have been regected?
Sam: Yes. Life sucks, buy a helmet
AG: Anything not as…I don’t know…Bumper Sticker-y?
SAm: FINE. Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try Again. Fail again. Fail better.
AG: Mhmm. Great. You’re hilarious
The Most Depressing Man Ever: Thanks
AG: LIGHTNING ROUND! What’s your favorite color?
Sam: Black
AG: PREDICTABLE! Do people call you Becks? You know, after the beer?
Becks: No
AG: Are you sure?
AG: Were you named after Samuel Adams or Sam the Eagel?
Sam the Adams Eagle: What?
AG: Yeah, that’s pretty obvious
Sam: I would be offended if I weren’t a figment of your imagination
AG: You know what, Samuel Beckett, I can put on a black turtleneck and brood, too!
AG: Sam, thanks so much for being such a good sport. BTW your plays are full of humor. Sometimes. People usually don’t get the joke
Sam: Don’t be absurd
AG: HA good one! Anyway, thanks for spending some hours with me. This has been the opposite of informative.
yaaaaaaaaaay finally i am the first one to like it 😀
love the whole article… it is AWESOME.. i wish Samuel could have read it…
i mean of course after he had given the interview…
how about next one is with T.S Eliot or maybe Ionesco … or better still Pirandello… i mean whoever is available 😀
Sammy’s a douche. And a nut. As in nutty. As in absurd.
{shakes head at self}
I really really needed this today. Thanks.
“AG: So basically, you’ve had your fair share of rejection”
*GASP* … you spelled it with the dreaded “j”…..
Does anyone else think he looks like Lyle Lovett’s dad?
LOL! Awesomeness. (Sticks hand in the air)
To Bodacious Boomer–I do!!
I would soooo pay to take your version of Theater History. (Wipes eyes) This was awesome genius stuff.
“A wise man named me” ROFL!!!! You are epic! Oh and turtlenecks . . . why do they even exist; just for people to brood?! *giggling*
I LOVE these dead playwright posts. Soo fun!
LOL this seriously cracks me up. Are you taking requests? 🙂
This is great AG, but oh my God… I had no idea we were in competition! I just put part 3 of Mozart up! So unexpected I’m spelling out the acronym. Laughing out loud!
Yes! This was great. You should wear turtlenecks all the time! My favorite part:
“Were you waiting for Godot?” Hahahahahaha…just so wonderful.
Thanks once again for the laugh/lesson on a Playwrite. I agree with Paige… Love the turtleneck.
We studied this play in Drama…and I actually enjoyed it. This made me laugh a lot ey.
Beckett was clearly a better interviewee than the bard. VG. Who’s next? Would you consider broadening your scope a little to include, say, Andrew Lloyd Webber. Neither dead, nor a playwright, but what the heck!
Turtlenecks are the worst thing ever.
You, my friend, have a knack for the absurd. Which is why I love you so!
You are so insanely funny. I just read this aloud to my coworkers. 🙂
Definitely my kind of man.
Love,
Lola
Samuel Beckett was an intense, Irish writer. I didn’t understand much of his writing, but still it was strangely intriguing. Like the man himself.
Very entertaining!
Im obliged for the post.Really thank you! Really Cool.