Guest Blog: Paige Kellerman

Rejection’s Not Just About Being Perfect
by Paige Kellerman

When AG asked me to do a guest post for him, I was over the moon. After writing “I’m a guest blogger” on my driveway, stenciling it on the dog and turning it into a magic marker barbed wire tattoo on my ankle, I ran back to the laptop and sent an email.

Dear AG,
That sounds cool or whatever. What would you like me to write about?
Paige

Re:
Dear Paige,
    Rejection.
P.S Do you just comment and not read the blog?
AG
My excitement turned to panic. “Rejection”..? Stopping the presses, I went to Urban Dictionary and tried to figure out what it meant. From what I could tell, it was negative word, implying I’d failed at something. I felt terrible. Poor AG picked the one person who’d never failed at anything in her whole life. For instance, when I was fifteen, all the boys loved me. At night, I’d record all the compliments I’d received that day, in my diary:
“Your sister’s really pretty. Would she go out with me?” “Could you move to the left so I can get a better look at the girl in front of you?” “Have you seen your hair, today?..The circus must be missing a bear.” “It’s a good thing God made you funny.”
Imagine all that in one day.
When I got to college, my professors had as much or more faith in me, writing praise-filled comments on my papers like, “What is this?”, “Maybe you should think about going into the food service industry..”, and “Did you read the book?”

My then-boyfriend was equally as encouraging when he left me at graduation with the parting words, “I think we should see other people. What’s your roommate doing later?”
By the time I got married and became a writer, I was riding the type of high a person can only get from enjoying a life-long history of never failing. I began blogging, submitting stories, and working on a book. The feedback I got from judges was always up-lifting; Usually along the lines of “We accepted everyone’s story except yours.” or “Did you edit this before you emailed it?”
Today, my confidence is lifted continually when I tell people I meet I’m a writer, and they respond with, “No really…what do you do? I’m looking for a maid.” So, it pained me to have to send another email to AG:
Dear AG,
     While I’m extremely flattered you’d like me to write for you, I can’t think of a time I’ve been rejected. I’ll get back to you when I think of something. Gotta run, the cake’s burning.
Sincerely,
Paige

——

Paige spent most of her formative years reading anything besides her school books . Made to write five paragraph essays, by her mother, like it was her job, she garnered enough knowledge to paste a transcript together on a Word document and sneak into college. After a reluctant Dean handed her a degree in English, and she managed to escape the claws of insurance underwriting, Paige found someone who felt sorry enough to marry her. Together, they made a child, that turned out to be two children. Today, she spends her time writing funny stories, taking care of kids, mixing the perfect Gin and Tonic, and figuring out how to get people to stop calling her “that home schooled girl”. She blogs four times a week at paigekellerman.com and is hard at work on her first book of short stories.

—–

Paige always makes me laugh and this entry was no exception, so I’d like to present her with the You Inspire Me blog award:  Thanks so much for sharing your gift of laughter with everybody.

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14 comments on “Guest Blog: Paige Kellerman

  1. Kelly Gamble says:

    Another funny person to follow. Thank you, I love it.

  2. Thank you for the wonderful award! *sniffs* You like me…you really like me…;) And thank you again for being so kind and letting me visit with all your readers, today!

  3. Thank you for making me realise that I too have never been rejected 🙂

  4. Elisa says:

    This had me rolling the whole way through! Is it possible to find two people who are actually funnier than A G. and Paige? . . . I actually don’t think so.

    Yesterday I told one of my friends about both of you. I said, “It’s rare to see such blatant talent.”

    I know this is suppose to be about regection, but if I were an agent or publisher, I’d snatch both of you up–seriously!

  5. melynda says:

    That was priceless. I now have to go find her blog. Sigh thanks for getting me hooked on ANOTHER great writer! Jerk. ( Was that to harsh? lol)
    I have to tell you I love your blog and your comments keep me in stitches. Thanks for coming over so often. Your a champ!

  6. Crystal says:

    OMG, it’s another one!!! Lol… Are you two related?

    Wow… Hey, guess what? I’ve never actually been regected, either!! This… is so cool! 😉

  7. Harnew says:

    I love how both Paige and AG find the humor in rejection. This is only my second day being a reader of this blog, however, I love it already. @Crystal Ha! I’m wondering are they related too.

  8. OMG! You are a riot. Thank you both for the humor 🙂

  9. Joshua says:

    Finally had a moment to read this post, just like I said I would, now that I’m not at work behind that damn firewall that won’t let me view WordPress blogs.

    I’m still unclear though: What is rejection? Is that some sort of vaccination?

  10. […] Thanks again to Paige for writing an awesome guest blog. […]

  11. This is a truly awesome guest blog! 😀 Love it.

    AG, I don’t have to tell you (but I am about to… again) that I love your blog.

    Now I am on my way to Paige’s blog to check it out and follow..

    Thank you for cracking me up!

    Darlene

  12. Isis Rushdan says:

    I love your Inspiration award. Paige’s guest blog deserved it.

    Happy you could take a vacay. We all need one.

  13. Joanna says:

    This sucks! No seriously, loved the humour. My first time on this blog, will be checking out both again!

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