The Interviewer: Hello, I’m so sorry I’m late WHOA you’ve been waiting here for 2 hours? My bad, lunch and all.
AG: That’s. Fiii iii iii ne, my time is not important at all.
The Interviewer: Does it hurt to talk through clenched teeth like that?
The Interviewer: GREAT so, shall we get started?
AG: Is that a real question?
The Interviewer: So let’s see, your name is AG…can I call you A, buddy?
AG: Can I call you T.I.?
The Interviewer: A! You’re funny! GREAT! So am I, so am I, listen to this one- knock knock.
AG: This is totally…this is totally not a waste of my time.
The Interview: MOO
AG: Moo…moo who
The Interviewer: THE ECONOMY!
The Interviewer: Oh mah bad, I totally messed up those punchlines
AG: You are…so funny……………………..
The Interviewer: So let’s see…you are completely and utterly qualified for this job!
AG: I know.
The Interviewer: You are actually the MOST qualified person I have met to date and am telling you this right to your face!
AG: Is that appropriate?
The Interviewer: I think I have lunch in my teeth.
The Interviewer: ANYWAY, yeah, this looks great, and I will be in touch!
5 Months Later….
Hey there buddy. I wanted to drop a note and thank you for applying to proof and edit my blog.
I did just hire someone for the position, five months after the fact. But why are you surprised, I was totally late to the interview!
My life is very important.
Thanks again, I remember what it was like reading those Playbill ads myself, back in the day when I was just a young theatrical whippersnapper like yourself. Ah, those were the days, my friend. I thought they’d never end.
But they did and now I’m too important to even be on time for an interview.
Good luck. You’ll need it.
Wait, who are you?
I am completely unprofessional!
Oh how EMBARRASSING I meant that for my lover! Ah, isn’t life funny?
Well, I hope you can forgive me and not try to seek revenge by completely re-writing this experience and posting it on a BLOG or something hahahaha.
That would be…that would be totally ironic.
I didn’t touch the first sentence of that rejection letter. Just wanted to let you all know!