Every writer is insecure.
(I didn’t say it was very complex.)
Sure, I know I look like this most of the time:
But most of the time I actually feel like this:
Truth is, if you’re a writer, every word you pen is a piece of yourself that you’re ripping from your skin and putting on display for people to look at under a microscope and analyze the crap out of.
It’s like you’re fingerpainting with your soul every time you write. Each word you leave behind is a fingerprint, after all.
BUT writing is a business and it is a business of Judgement in a world where people like to point out flaws.
I mean, here’s just a common example between – we’ll call them A and B
A: Oh, hey B, how’s it hanging?
B: Beautifully, no complaints
A: Awesome. Hey, have you seen K?
B: Yeah, ran into him at the market the other day.
A: Yeah…Hey, can we just be real for a minute.
A: I mean, K’s a really great laugh at a party and it’s kinda cool that he’s worth so much in scrabble
B: And he’s not completely worthless like X
A: Right? But…what’s the use of K
B: YEAH! I mean, C really takes care of the CAH sound
A: He’s really just stealing jobs away from C
B: And then, and then as if that’s not good enough, he’s got to go and be a silent bastard!
A: But only sometimes!
B: He doesn’t do anything anybody else doesn’t already do!
A: Just taking up space
B: I know UGH look, I can’t bleieve I just used him in a sentence, you wouldn’t even kn…REALIZE if you weren’t reading
A:….hey B, you seem rounder than usual
B: SHOVE IT UP YOUR A
See, even letters judge and point out flaws.
It’s the nature of words.
This is the business of rejection. The business of flaw-finding. And because these words are your soul, it’s always personal. And that leads to insecurities.
Listen, C isn’t as great as A and B made him CraCked up to be. We all know that, right? I mean, one can make the argument, why do we need C? Sometimes he’s a soft sound, like an S and sometimes he sounds like a K, so isn’t C just taking jobs away from K?! Something tells me that when A, B and C aren’t working, they’re all hanging out together and shooting the breeze and C brought up those points against K. Poor K didn’t have a chance to defend himself.
And so is the same in this business of writing.
That’s why I say SCREW JUDGEMENT AND REJECTION! And why I spell my regection with a g- because I’m embracing it and making it my own.
As should everyone.
As should you.
Just want to shout out and say THANKS to Alex who created the Insecure Writer’s Support Group of which this blog was written for. Check it, and all the blogs, out.